From the time we are young, our parents take care of us in every possible way. From ensuring that we have the correct eating and sleeping habits to teaching us values and virtues; from answering all our possible questions to quelling our curiosity to spending their hard earned money and time to see us grow into good human beings, our parents do so much for us. And thus, when they grow old, isn’t it our duty to take care of them?
There are numerous incidents the world over about children refusing to spend money on medical facilities and the likes for their parents. The thinking goes like – ‘Why bother spending money on someone who isn’t even going to survive for more than a couple of years’? Then there are those who don’t even bother keeping their parents with them at all. Instead, they just leave them in some old age home to die as the months and years go by. Some old age homes have caretakers who ensure proper care for everyone. But in most such homes, no one really bothers taking proper care of everyone. Parents die in such homes not so much out of medical reasons but out of psychological and emotional reasons of having been thrown out of their own houses by their own children.
But why do we behave in such a way with our parents when they grow old?
In my opinion, the prime reason is the fact that we humans always tend to think about ourselves. All of us want to earn a lot of money, be really successful, have good food everyday and live a delightful life. If there is the added burden of having to spend that money on things like medical facilities for oldies, wouldn’t it be such a pain in an otherwise fun life? Why bear nagging parents each and everyday? Why take the pain to explain them about latest technology like Whatsapp, Facebook, Smartphones etc?
A lot of us move away to different parts of the world to find that ‘delightful life‘. But do we think about our parents before that shift? Do we try to ensure that they can come and stay along with us? Or is it, simply another way to get rid of them?
When we are in the teenage years, we feel that our parents don’t know anything and are always too irritating with all the instructions they give us. But as we grow older and have kids of our own, we finally realize that our parents were always right.
In the end, it’s all about what our children see us practice. If we consider taking care of parents next to godliness, our children will also follow the same for us. But if we don’t, then you know the answer.
Linking to NaBloPoMo (National Blog Post Month – February – My post no 14 for this month.
Alana Mautone (@RamblinGarden)
When you mistreat an elder, your children, whether young or adult, definitely see it. In all fairness, though, in my 62 years I have seen a lot of complex relationships between older adults and their middle aged children who struggle to do what is right. Sadly, sometimes there are good reasons for children abandoning their parents – we never fully know what goes on behind closed doors. I’ve seen grown children, despite less than ideal childhoods, still step up. But it isn’t always as clear cut black and white as we would like to think.
True Alana, the situation is not as black or as white as what I have mentioned in my post. But my basic point was just to highlight how taking care of our parents in their old age is something which is very important in our lives. When we do take care, our children learn.
Otherwise, it comes to bite us back in the future when our children repeat the same when it comes to us.
But obviously, there are various cases like poverty etc where it maybe unreasonable to think that children can take care of their parents.
Having going through a phase where my parents are growing old and they need attention I feel scared for them. But on the other had I feel that we siblings being born with an age gap helps in the whole process of being responsible towards our parents. The thought of any parent being miatreated by their children is a very saddening feeling
Forum, it surely is saddening to think that individuals just forget the people who take care of their every need from the time they are born.
Read the blog with mixed emotions as taking care of an old parent… definitely the task is not very easy, nor you can explain the situation in such simple words.…
Yeah it’s not easy at all. But then when the same son or daughter was born and being cared upon by the parents, it wasn’t as easy task either, right? 🙂
I agree to to each word here Aseem. I would say one should treat parents the way they would like to be treated by their own children. It all comes back in the end.
So true Parul. When we treat our parents in a horrible way, we don’t realize that this fact would come to bite us back many years later when our kids treat us the same way.