Why do we give some people more importance than they deserve?


Source: http://verymanytips.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/Great-Tips-to-Make-a-Woman-Feel-Special-e1317716433997.jpg

We meet different kinds of people in life. Some of them are awesome. They shape our world, our lives, our thinking, everything about them is just amazing. And we end up giving them the maximum importance. But then some are not so awesome but still good enough to define our lives, careers and thoughts. And finally there are those who irritate us, trouble us, frustrate us and stress us out. They don’t deserve our attention, our love or either our care. But despite all the problems they cause in our lives, we end up giving them a lot of importance. Why is that? Do they really deserve it?

As someone has said, we don’t give as much importance to praise as we do to criticism. This is because criticism hits you us it hurts the most. None of us think that we are are not good enough. If someone praises us, it does boost our ego to an extent. But then criticism makes us wonder, how dare a particular person say that. Even though that person drives us nuts or completely crazy to the point of giving a headache we still think about him / her. And this ends up giving those problematic individuals a high pedestal in our lives which they least deserve.

Happiness over something lasts for a couple of hours or days. But frustration, stress, tension can trouble even the best of us for weeks on end until we find a way to get the stress out of our lives. We think of the numerous problems he / she has caused in our lives during most of our waking hours and even our dreams. We keep cribbing or getting worried about all the wrong they have caused. Slowly but surely, despite not wanting to, we end up letting them define our lives! But is it useful? We end up spoiling our health, our sleep, our lives for someone who doesn’t even bother much.

Interestingly, many of us don’t even know that we have given some useless people much more importance than they deserve. If someone asks us, where so and so stands in our life, we don’t rate them more than 1-2 on a scale of 10. But is that any comfort if all our time is spent in thinking about them?

Life is short. Try to be happy because you never know when tragedy can strike. Everyone has the right to say or give you some advice. If you start listening to everyone, then you are surely headed for disaster. There are only a small few who criticize you, stress you or irritate you for your own good. Listen to them. Sit with them. Try to evaluate what’s wrong with you. But for others just learn to ignore or smile and move off. There’s no point thinking so much and wasting your time. It’s precious.

As someone has rightly said, sometimes being silent and ignoring the opposite person is the best response! Practice it!

Leave a Reply

  1. Great read, and yeah, just be happy. If we were all the same like would be Orwellian and everyone would be same, and it would be as boring as watching Cricket. (Sorry if you like Cricket, or don’t even know what it is, its DREADFUL)

    I like the message, and you inspire yourself.

    Shaun x

  2. I suppose the core reason why we would give undue importance would be reluctance to accept our image that is projected by ourselves, Since we are never satisfied with how others perceive us, we keep giving them weightage. Its like a Hebbian learning based neural network which learns based on wrong weight to inputs. We cant change the inputs that are fed to it, but how much weight we give to them, is definitely in our hands. However, on the same point, its only human to be affected, if we dont err on that issue, we cease to be a part of learning.

    • Yeah being affected is understandable. But sadly what we end up doing is giving those guys all the attention in our lives which indirectly results in giving them so much importance that we forget our daily or weekly tasks. We forget that our lives are not run by them but by us, by what we think and what we do and achieve. Everyone has an opinion whether good or bad. But we need to see who to give importance to and who not to.